Riding the highs and lows

“Allow for a quiet moment, and remind yourself why it will be alright.”

Tough stretch?

I could give you some practical tips that might help you feel better. But no.

You’re really in it this time. Nothing going on. Nothing to look forward to. Sure there are ways to be productive and force yourself out of paralyzing depression. But that’s just it. You know this, and yet you still choose to do nothing and sulk. Because well… fuck it.

So my advice is to continue doing nothing. Ride it out. Sit in the stink. Stir your own stew. Endure.

In this state you can become a passive observer. Thoughts and feelings will come and go around how you got here, what you need to do to get out, whether or not you can. Let them. Don’t fixate or spiral, but do pay attention and take note.

Also note that you have been here before and that you have come out the other end better for it. Also know that you will eventually take action and climb out. Not now. Perhaps tomorrow or the next day. You will. You’ll learn something new about yourself and your process, and you’ll make an adjustment that may work until the next time you hit a spell. Rinse and repeat.

By the way, the same goes for trips on the other end of the spectrum, when you’re jacked up on dopamine and riding the highs of extreme elation. Not much to do there either, and it also won’t last. Still, you can sit in the joy - observe it, feel it until the great, inevitable crash.

No sense in trying to avoid highs or lows, or in trying to prolong the highs and shorten the duration of the lows. Over time, you’ll want to just work on making trips to each end less extreme. No spikes of tidal waves and the fallout from them. Just mellow waves up and down that you can balance on top of like a surfer dude.

This is a lifelong balancing act. You’ll get better and better at managing the highs and lows that come with this experience.

So next time you’re feeling down - good. Soak it in. Ride the wave. Work on becoming a cool surfer dude.

It’s going to be fine.

Love to all -

---

Related Poetry

Trying to turn things around

From Fire & Earth: A ThoughPose Poetry Collection | 9/4/2019

When your dreams are chasing you
And luck says, “Break a leg.”
So you literally do

When you’re what alot is going through
And your wish to stop wishing
Doesn’t come true

When even the grays are feeling blue
And it feels like time flies,
Only after it flew

When you’re the shit that it happens to
And what you’ve always thought
You never quite knew

---

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The 15-minute rule

“Try hard not to try so hard”

I’ve seen variations of this trick explained elsewhere, so I can’t claim credit for inventing it. But after practicing this myself with great success, I find it worthwhile to re-emphasize here for those who are looking for a jump-start.

There are things you want to get done. Important things, worth doing. But you just don’t have the energy or the discipline to get started. And the hardest part of any task or initiative is starting - this is well-known.

When you are at the gym and in the middle of a workout, you’re not thinking about how much it sucks. You’re too busy doing the work, focused on the moves and riding the momentum you generated once you got started. And after the workout is done - it’s a high way better than any drug. You did it!

When you are writing and in flow state, there’s no more dread or hesitation around sitting down to write. You’re in it, exploring your mind and transposing what you imagine into the right words. And after a productive writing session - you’re enthralled that your ideas have more life than ever before.

When you are cleaning the house, or even at a job you hate getting a specific task done - the thoughts and feelings that categorized these chores and tasks as dreadful and full of suck are no longer there. You are in it, getting it done and in anticipation for the reward of being done (along with any other rewards you may have lined up for yourself for after).

It is never the work itself that presses down on you, causing hesitation and procrastination. It is starting the work. The brief moment where you decide you are going to do something that you know you should do. That’s the hard part that makes your to-dos seem too daunting, intimidating and downright scary. The start.

The best practical way I found to sidestep these paralyzing thoughts is to use the 15-minute rule. It is a mental compromise, a way to trick yourself into starting something. Again, once you start, the hard part is over. The fear and intimidation is gone because now you must focus on the task at-hand.

If there’s something you should get done, make a deal with yourself - a compromise to just do 15 minutes worth of the job. You can even set a timer.

15 minutes is nothing. At the same time, you can get a lot done in that time.

For example in the case of working out, set a 15-minute timer and switch between push-ups, sit-ups, and squats. So, do push-ups until you can’t do anymore, then switch to sit-ups until you can’t do anymore, then squats, then back to push-ups and so on. You will be absolutely spent by the time that timer goes off. Then you’re done, and only 15 minutes of your day was spent.

Same for cleaning - take 15 minutes and just focus on a certain room or area of the house. Same for writing - write a page or a few paragraphs. You get the idea.

The real trick to this is the fact that 9 times out of 10, you will willingly go past the 15-minute mark without even noticing. Even if the timer goes off, I bet you’ll hit the snooze and resume what you were doing. If you do stop after 15, that’s ok too. But in either case you:

• Accomplished something that is 15-minutes (at least) more done than the 0 minutes you almost gave into

• Will get a real nice dopamine/endorphin hit that is way more potent and euphoric than whatever you were going to do instead

• Will be practicing how to breach the starting of something - the hardest part of doing most things - more consistently

• Will be teaching yourself how to operate more efficiently

Try it. Let me know how it goes. Did you go past 15 minutes?

Love to all -

Drew

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Related Poetry

Get to work

From Fire & Earth: A ThoughPose Poetry Collection | 2/20/2020

Traded tricks, fixated

Made this, if/then branch sticks -

Yet better than bricks,

Instead of mixed, faded,

Complacent, “sick day, stayed since”,

Lament blame stints,

Say it’s a labor of “trading nicks”,

Favorite lately:

“Been taking daily licks”

Laziness, faked upticks

Played victim, gravely mistaken

“This sucks” schticks…

Exited - stuck. Strayed for kicks

Then affixed.

---

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Reflections after one full year of work independence

“There is an insightful difference between those who suggest to be who they are and those who decide to be who they are.”

After a long tenure, I left a really good full-time job to become an independent contractor and to focus more on my creative side.

Here are a few honest takeaways after one full year of work independence.

Freedom of schedule means come up with a rigid schedule

Here, it’s a good exercise of discipline and work ethic to build a strong routine from scratch. When you are independent, each day is yours to build as you see fit. Ironically, this freedom has resulted in reliable structure and consistent effort. Others would see my day-to-day as boring, but I love my routine.

The who?

It is ok - recommended, even - to mix work life with personal life, when appropriate and to a certain degree.

The best business relationships are sometimes also friendships, where we can be rely on each other to be open and honest and to work for the greater good.

If not, that’s ok too. But working with cool people is much, much better than working where there’s friction. You have more control over this when you’re independent.

Work and play

This has been the most fun part for me, personally - Building time into my routine to blend business experience with creative endeavors. It’s technically work, but it doesn’t feel like work. It feels like playing a fun video game with different levels that can be approached in a number of ways.

I’m always writing or working on sharing writing. It used to feel scary and dreadful. Now it’s just a part of my life that I’m growing, like a garden in the backyard of a lovely home.

I don’t get paid much for this creative “work” yet. But, I know from experience that, so long as I stay consistent, continue to improve the process and produce good work that offers value to its audience, I will eventually earn a living from my creative endeavors.

This is true for you as well.

Each of you have something valuable to offer that you love, that no one else can offer. Figuring out what that is and then pursuing it is the equivalent of being able to work and play at the same time.

Nothing days

Not to be had often, but to be had with full commitment when needed.

I wrote about this elsewhere, but allow for a “do nothing day” when you can. The Nothing Day then contradicts itself by gaining purpose, which is to rest, recalibrate and to better prepare for the next Something Day.

Money is not as important

Of course, income is necessary. But I don’t work for a paycheck anymore. I work to offer high value to others, and to continue to explore new and expansive ways to offer that value.

Be authentic, be consistent, work hard for the right reasons. The money comes as a byproduct of this.

For those who are also independent - what’s an important lesson you’ve learned?

---

Related Poetry

Go

From Air & Water: A ThoughPose Poetry Collection | 3/19/2019

Look out far
Find a spot
Grab a map
Trace the path
Get your shoes
Take a step

---

Ways and means

From Fire & Earth: A ThoughPose Poetry Collection | 6/10/2019

I’ve got a dull edge
And a broken hand
Where the handle used to be

You’ve got bad vision,
Holding a sign that sort of
Looks like a bullseye from here

We’ve got a decent shot
Shoddy means,
But an end in sight, it seems

---

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Rorschach - A Poetic Reflection on Perception, Reality and Imagination

“What do you really see when you look up at all those clouds and their fun shapes?”

Sharing a poem today that I wrote back in 2024 as part of the Fire & Earth collection.

The poem is called “Rorschach”, and explores the difference between base reality and perceived reality.

We each see the world in our own way. Sometimes what we see and believe to be true are in fact figments of imagination that become augmented atop the real world.

Be careful not to skew the truth too much, at the cost of lying to not only others around you, but to yourself as well.

That said, also be careful not to limit your imagination. If you imagine something with vivid detail and consistent effort, then there’s a strong chance that you will manifest what you believe to be true into base reality.

Enjoy and let me know what you see. I’ll start to add more featured poetry into the weekly newsletter mix.

Thanks and love to all -

---

Rorschach

From Fire & Earth: A ThoughPose Poetry Collection | 3/17/2024

There aren’t even words

Anymore, just patterns

To pick out and rip apart,

Or subtle differences

That may tell small tales,

About where one starts

And the other ends

Passed out to interpret

As if a hidden meaning‘s

Name may be called

What do you really see

When you look up

At all those clouds

And their fun shapes?

Something tricking your

Brain to tell the truth

Break through derangement

All from some black marks

And the false premise

That anything can be known

If you linger on it long enough

Thoughts like tourist travelers,

Grouping up, passing by

And then splitting off again

The wings of a dead bat

The face of an old man

A pair of dancing bears

Spilled ink on white paper

---

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“So long, and make it a good day”

“Reputations are not built on what a person intends to do.”

My Grandfather was a news anchor for a local channel back in the day. He used to end every show with a closing thought and the same slogan, “So long, and make it a good day.”

How simple, yet profound and impactful. He was also a writer and a poet. For those who are also writers, you understand the level of detail and effort that goes into finding just the right words to capture an intended meaning, moment and/or emotion.

The subtle choice to say “make it” vs. “have” when suggesting a good day; The simplicity of that line, yet the depth that it carries - it’s brilliant writing. All writers strive to say more with less.

Take a moment to reflect on your recent days as well as the days ahead. How have they been? Are you letting the days happen? Or are you happening to the days?

My Grandfather understood that good days, while some may end up that way by chance, are earned. They’re earned through being honest, well-intentioned and through focused effort. We each have that power, to make life good. Every day when you wake up - and this is especially true for the days you’re not looking forward to, or the days within a tough stretch when things aren’t going well and haven’t been for a while. What are you going to do to make it better?

We all have the same 24 hours. Some choose to let the day pass by. Some choose to dwell and wallow in spite of the new day afforded to them. Some just don’t care to take advantage of the time they have on Earth.

Some people wake up knowing that this day, like every other, is a gift full of opportunities to utilize and wonders to explore.

What kind of day are you going to have today?

So long -

---

Related Poetry

The Once-Shiny Nickel

From Air & Water: A ThoughtPose Poetry Collection | 4/3/2019

Saved for later
Spent, forgotten

The wish you tossed
The jangle when there's more
The 50/50 chance of luck

The change you need
To make a dollar

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Some things we all have in common…

“If you’re ever being too hard on yourself (or others), just remember that you’re literally made of stars that exploded billions of years ago. Fuck yeah.”

Right, left. Red, blue. Black, white. This, that. Shut up.

Did you know we all share about 99.9% of our DNA? That might make you wonder why so much emphasis is focused on the .1%. A casual glance in the comments section of literally any post online, and you’d think we all come from completely different universes.

But no, we didn’t. In fact, all life descends from one, single common ancestor - a microscopic organism that lived about four billion years ago. And every human began as one fertilized cell that has since divided into trillions.

Going even further back, every atom of every living body came from exploding stars, recycled matter. And every one of those atoms will eventually become something else.

More things we all have in common (there are many more, this is a fractional collection of fun facts):

• Every human body glows - it’s called biophoton emission

• We all contain the same basic elements (carbon, oxygen, hydrogen, nitrogen)

• Every living thing is temporary

• Every human has lived during the same 0.0000000000000000000001% slice of cosmic time

• All life is programmed to respond to its environment

• Everyone is at the center of their own subjective universe

• Everyone fears being alone

• Every living thing is built to repair itself

• Laughter exists in every culture on the planet - dogs, apes, foxes and even rats laugh, too

• We all are part of an unbroken chain of survival going back billions of years

• We all share the miracle of life, of which we know almost nothing about

If you are someone receiving or delivering negativity or hate towards one of your fellow beings, I hope you will consider these commonalities, which are far more significant in both quantity and quality as compared to any differences that may exist in that .1%.

You are not more right or more wrong than anyone else. Thinking you are will lead you down a path that isolates you from others who are just here, sharing the same rock as you, also not really knowing much about anything at all.

If we all committed to contributing outwards in a positive way instead of a negative way, as often as possible, I wonder what could be.

Another thing we can all agree on - love is way better than hate. With that in mind, start with loving yourself (there are so, so many reasons to, even if you can’t always recognize them). Then share that love you possess with the other living beings that you interact with. If they don’t love you back, show them through your example how, or at least why they should. Oops, there’s that should word again…

Remember, it’s a miracle that we’re here. Don’t you agree?

Love to all -

---

Related Poetry

Existing

From Air & Water: A ThoughPose Poetry Collection | 6/3/2018

Here in some instance of eternity

Sitting, smiling back at itself

---

STFU

From Fire & Earth: A ThoughPose Poetry Collection | 11/21/2024

Just shut your fucking mouth

I’m yelling now, okay?

You’re wrong about this, since

It’s coming from you…

Someone like you, at least.

And I must be right because

I can’t handle otherwise.

LIES, LIES, LIES!

Am I the only one trying

Not to try, to take it easy,

All in stride on a zen-diagrammed

Slice of common-ground pie?

I mean, Jesus fucking Christ.

But it’s not your fault.

You numb fucking lab rat,

You’re too laced with bad speed,

Caught in a stationary wheel of

Non-consensual experimentation,

Inside death cages made to look like

Salvation, and dead-end mazes

Made to look like rewarding,

Miniature puzzle games.

I bet you can’t even guess

What happens next.

You know, why don’t you

Go and get the facts,

Then come back and talk

To me. Then, only then,

You can tell me the truth:

That there is no such thing,

That it all goes wrong when

Everyone’s always right,

That we’ve been pitted against

One another in an unranked,

Online Battle Royale match

With endless respawns,

Infinite ammo and no armor

And you know what? It worked,

Because I could fucking kill you.

So until then, when the

Cheetos dust settles and

The keys stop impressing,

And the robots stop caring

About the fact that we just

Don’t care at all anymore

When open conversations

Stay that way, closed-

Mindedness stops sucking up

All the suckers, and we again

Realize we’ve been on the same

Team this whole damn time

Until then, just please

Shut

The

Fuck

Up.

---

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What to do when you don’t know what to do

“Stop being a dick to your future self.”

Feeling stuck? I’ll get straight to the point. This should take you ~20 minutes.

On one piece of paper, make a list of four different lists, one in each corner, with 3-5 items each:

• Types of content you consume most often

• Successful people you admire/follow along with what they do

• Skills you have or would like to have

• Hobbies and other ways you spend free time

Now make one more list in the middle with three columns of:

• Column 1: Potential ways to spend your time that combines items and ideas from at least two of your other lists

• Column 2: How this idea could help others

• Column 3: How this idea could help you (with boredom, purpose, mental health, and/or financially)

It should look something like this:

Download this template as a PDF

It might take some creative energy, but that’s the fun part. Here’s a free template you can use.

Filling this out marks the beginning of your next chapter. If you’re discouraged and you’re not sure what to do with your life, or you at least know that what you’re currently doing isn’t it, then this is what to do.

Don’t put pressure on this exercise, and don’t feel like you need to come up with THE answer right away. Rather, treat this exercise like a puzzle or like a video game with levels to beat. Start with this worksheet and, when you come up with something in the middle section that resonates with you, well then you’ve beaten level 1.

If you chip away at solving this puzzle/beating the game on a consistent basis (especially during those times where you feel stagnant and unsure of what to do), then you not only will have solved boredom or feeling stuck, you may well also have unlocked a career path for yourself and answered the question, “What is my purpose?”

Keep at it. You have something special to contribute to the world that no one else has. You owe it to yourself and to others who may benefit to figure out what that special something is.

For me, word art and sharing these reflections to help others was the thing in the middle of my piece of paper. Identifying and then pursuing this has changed my life.

I look forward to seeing what you come up with!

Love to all -

---

Related Poetry

Pick a hobby

From Air & Water: A ThoughtPose Poetry Collection | 11/7/2018

Hobby roulette

Not-too obvious intent

I find my goals get lost

Before they’re known,

Nevermind properly set

I’d probably be better off

Sharpening focus instead

But I’m more open-ended

Than closed off, I guess

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Please, stop saying these words…

“Be bound to your word, and speak it profoundly.”

Shoulda / coulda / woulda - knock it off with using these words? Will ya?

It should… wait… It will never be the case that something doesn’t get done, simply because you thought you should or could or would, but then still chose not to. Right?

Alas, as demonstrated above, how easy it is to fall into that trap?

I’ve talked about this before, but of course you won’t be perfect at this, and sometimes the opportunity to correct a shoulda/woulda/coulda will have passed.

But every time you think “I should [insert thing you think you should to]”, just go do the thing. Prioritize it, as your intuition suggests.

A small way to practice this every day is to respond as quickly as possible to everyone that reaches out to you - whether it’s a colleague or an old friend or even someone you don’t like. Whether it’s an email or a text or a call. Pick up. Respond. Be available. This is better than thinking in your head (for hours, sometimes days) that you should get back to that person.

This practice applies to tasks as small as cleaning your room, to goals as large as changing your career. It’s obvious, but still bears repeating that if you practice this on the small things, you will become better at WILLING yourself forward through the big things.

Hope that helps. Now, I shall get back to storyboarding this next project…

Love to all -

---

Related Poetry

Ways and means

From Fire & Earth: A ThoughPose Poetry Collection | 6/10/2019

I’ve got a dull edge

And a broken hand

Where the handle used to be

You’ve got bad vision,

Holding a sign that sort of

Looks like a bullseye from here

We’ve got a decent shot

Shoddy means,

But an end in sight, it seems

---

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Befriending self doubt

Meet Garrett, the friend you never knew you needed

“You’re the bestest friend you could ever get. Treat yourself as such.”

The guy you keep seeing in these thumbnail images? That’s Garrett. And Garrett’s a real piece of work.

He’s the type who shows up late to the party just to crash it, eats and drinks everyone else’s stuff because he didn’t bring anything, and then leaves (also late).

He’s the guy who can lie out of both corners of his mouth… to himself.

He lives inside your head, talking shit whenever he gets the chance.

He represents self-doubt, the uglier version of yourself you catch in the mirror when no one else is looking. Garrett is the reminder that you have work to do, that you’re not doing.

Oh, Garrett.

You’d think the goal would be to kill off the poor bastard, or shove him deeper into the dark corners you dare not explore.

But Garrett - and your relationship with him - is invaluable. In fact, he may be your best friend, and you probably didn’t even know he existed so clearly.

Garrett doesn’t need to shut up. He’s right more often than you’d like. Has he told you lately that you suck? Good. He may have a point.

Treat your self-doubt like a bad friend with occasionally good advice. Sometimes, at your lowest, it can feel like Garrett is all you’ve got.

He’s not always right. He’s not always on time. But one way or another, he’ll let you know what’s going on, even when - ESPECIALLY when - you don’t want to hear it. Respect.

Self-doubt is your companion whether you like it or not. It’s not about battling it or vilifying ol’ Garrett. It’s about learning to pick up on the signals he sends - God knows he’s not going to be direct.

But he will clue you in on areas of your life you can (and secretly want to) improve.

Feeling behind in life? Not equipped to take a big chance? Unlovable? Like something must just be wrong with you?

Have you asked Garrett why he feels that way?

Because, as it turns out, Garrett is actually pretty easy to talk to. You just have to get past the awkward posture, the shit-eating frown, and the lazy drifting eyes that never seem fixed on anything. He’ll tell you everything you need to know. He might even help you clear the hurdle.

And feel free to call Garrett out on his bullshit, too. Sometimes he exaggerates or assumes because he doesn’t see the full picture, or because he just wants to be a dick. Again, he’s not always right. But this inner conversation matters. It’s how you move toward a version of yourself that is realistic, authentic, more confident, and better at communicating.

Over time, Garrett starts to seem less like a nuisance who shows up whenever he damn well pleases, and more like someone who arrives right when you need him.

Everyone has their own Garrett. Treat him with respect. Learn to live with him. He’s not so bad.

He just needs a friend.

Your self-doubt - the thoughts and feelings that once handcuffed you - can become welcomed insights and useful tools for improving your relationship with Garrett… and thus with yourself.

---

Related Poetry

Such Old Friends

From Fire & Earth: A ThoughPose Poetry Collection | 3/1/2024

Old friends

In our ways

There are the

Passive remarks

Distant and foreign

But near, inside even

The words would come

So easy, they surely would

But then again, such old friends

Need not speak, but listen instead

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